Confusing Punishments

Last night, as I was laying the bed, I learnt that Shruthi hit Swathi because Swathi called her a ‘bad’ girl. Shruthi tried to patch up with Swathi since the latter wanted to complain about Shruthi to me. Shruthi apologized with her and also checked if it pained her and tried to stroke Swathi to ease off the pain but Swathi was so adamant that she would complain to me. Shruthi then followed Swathi as the latter approached me and whispered in her ears not to make a big issue out of it.

Swathi : Amma, Shruthi hit me.

I looked at Shruthi and I could figure out from her expressions that her whisper in to Swathi’s ears was about this.

Me: Shruthi! Why did you do that?

Shruthi: It is because she called me a ‘bad’ girl.

Me: Why would you beat her if she called you that way? Just like how she came to me, you could have also complained about her to me.

Shruthi was silent.

Me: As a punishment, you are going to sleep alone. Swathi will not sleep with you tonight. She will sleep with us.

Shruthi: But why?

Me: You got to know the value of a sister. Only if you miss her, you will understand the importance of a sister.

Shruthi: I already know about her importance. That is why I said ‘sorry’ to her and also tried to ease off her pain though I knew it wouldn’t have pained her much.

Me: No way Shruthi. I cannot allow this kind of physical interference. You are sleeping alone tonight.

Shruthi: But I want somebody next to me. I have a bad back too!

(My Mom complains of a bad back. I too have problem with my back and this girl is also complaining. I don’t understand! A 6 ½ year old child having back pain!)

Me: What back pain? You did not tell me about this!

Shruthi: Yes, it is paining.

Me: So if Swathi sleeps near you, will the back pain disappear?

Shruthi: Yes, she will massage.

Me: See! Do you now know how important it is to have a sister next to you? So miss her for a night. You will realize.

Shruthi: I am scared that monster would come and disturb me in the night.

Me: You should have thought about all these before hitting Swathi.

Shruthi: But, I did not know what kind of punishment you will give me.

It was an unexpected answer and I also realized that kids get confused as to what kind of punishment will be given at what times. Earlier, the only kind of punishment I used to subject them was ‘time out’. Of late, they started enjoying a time out session. So we began treating them to a different kind of treatment based on the incidents. No doubt, Shruthi was not left alone last night. In fact, I slept with her to ease her pain off. After few minutes, I just laughed at the entire episode. It happens every time I scold them. I also think if such punishments will really make them understand what they are doing. As a ritual, I punish them and they accept it diligently as a routine. Is there any meaning to the punishments that I subject them to? But all said and done, my punishments are never serious and even if I give them any punishment, I waive them off in no minutes. They are after all, my children!